The cutest little pillowcases - lucky bargains! #1

Hey guys!

I just ordered the cutest little pillowcases online at hm.com - they're on sale and I just couldn't resist since I love pugs and french bulldogs ... like, a lot. Thus the idea for this kind of series was born: Whenever I see bits and pieces on sale that I think are worth sharing, I'll let you know and of course link the shops... I feel like most of us are on a budget in some kind of way and a little sale always makes me super happy, so maybe you'll find something for yourself too?
But enough chatter, look at those unbelieveable cuties:

picture credit h&m

shop them at hm.com

♥

Rebecca

Bloglovin ♥

You can now follow my blog with Bloglovin!

simply saturday #1 - black and white

Hello guys,

today I want to start a new segment called simply saturday where I want to show you the simple and small things in my daily life that for some reason make me feel happy; like a plain but beautiful drawing, a great quote i found online or - like today - a very easy and plain but still quite lovely outfit.
I will also start using this theme on my instagram and twitter whenever something inspires me.

Rebecca

♥

Today, this simple black and white outfit made me feel extremely comfy (:

Overcoming Depression - #1 - The first steps are made

Hello guys,

today I want to talk to you about something serious: Anxiety, existential crises and depression are only a few key words to describe what has been a part of my life for around 6 years now. If you're easily triggered, please make sure you're feeling safe or maybe do not read this until you're in a more stable mental state.

Why I've decided to make a post on this? Well, the last few months have been quite difficult for me and this week I'm feeling like I'm finally starting to make progress; I wanted to share this fragile piece of hope and maybe let this blog be some kind of diary for me to see how far I've come and where I maybe need to invest some more work. Also I really need to get the story out of my system since not many people know about this; and sometimes talking to a heap of strangers on the internet can actually be easier than talking to someone in person.

I've been struggling with mental health problems for a good 6 years now; it's first appearance even before completing my 12th year of life. I've always had problems with my self-confidence. When I was 9, I was a chronic liar to the point where it would affect my whole life; I always felt like the way I truly was wouldn't be enough or even "likeable enough" to make people accept me - I made up stories about how I had been kidnapped when I was 6, about how I were a masterful guitar player or how I've met celebrities - it all was quite the mess and when my lies finally got debunked people were mad and my last friends turned away. Needless to say I was extremely happy when my family moved to another place where I could have a fresh new start.
But unfortunately things didn't get better. Although I had stopped with the lying and tried to make friends just as the kid I was at that time, the other kids didn't seem to like me very much. Some really bad things started going down and I was bullied until even my last hope was gone and I felt all alone and completely worthless. Things didn't get any easier up until I was 16; where I finally felt like a certain group of people (not necessarily good friends, but at least I had someone) could actually accept me as one of them.

Since then I didn't really care about what happened earlier in my life, I decided not to think about it anymore and proceeded living my life up until two years ago, when a lot of that stuff came back around and pulled me down into this really dark place where it was starting to get really hard to get out alone.

Daily stuff that had never been a difficulty started to feel like an unmanageable task; things I loved to do my whole life didn't feel like much fun anymore; I stopped doing most of my hobbies and work became unbearable. It wasn't until then when I realized I had to do something about this. I didn't feel ill or like it was a serious threat in any way; I just thought that maybe this was a little worse than normal and maybe I should do something about it but I couldn't wrap my head around it entirely.
A few weeks later I got hospitalized and stayed in a psychic ward for two months. I honestly don't want to talk about this time (yet), I will most definitely write something about it at some point since it was a hard time but also helped me quite a lot to accept that I really was sick and needed help - but let's not talk about this in any detail now.

When I got out, things seemed to be better. I started a new phase in my life - at least it felt like that - and tried some new jobs in the social field. Stuff was being okay and I landed myself a spot in a very prestigious catholic private school to become a child care worker. But things again became difficult and I was getting more and more frustrated about how everyone seemed to be perfectly able to put up with their daily life except me. I felt like I was just being lazy or stupid or simply not good enough to do anything; every task seemed like a huge pile of impossible stress.

I knew I had to do something quickly this time. I called the psychiatric ward I had been at the last time; I managed things with my school and luckily got the chance to take a year off to focus on my mental health.
Yesterday I had my first appointment with my new therapist. She's a very friendly and warm-hearted lady and I really feel like I can make it work this time.

I really want to keep this "diary" thing updated so I can see how far I've come and how hard I worked to get to the point where I am today; being finally able to accept the fact that I really am sick and I am worth getting help (which was a big step for me to admit).

Sorry that today's post isn't the usual kind of stuff, but I still hope you like it and maybe get to see a little more of what's going on in my mind all the time - it can get difficult for relatives and friends of depressed people to understand how much the person they love really struggles.

Rebecca

Daily Essentials & New Friends

Hello guys,

sorry it took me so long for my next post. I have been working a lot the last week and mostly in the afternoon and evenings; so when I got home I was super tired and went to bed almost immediately, so I couldn't make time for the blog - Sorry!

But today was my free day so I decided to talk to you about my daily go-to's when it comes to make-up, basically the things I couldn't ever live without. A few weeks back you already got to know some of the stuff in my winter necessities post where I told you about my season-specific favourites. Some of those have actually been in my collection for quite a bit and have been re-buyed a lot - but since I'm quite curious and experimental when it comes to new products I tend to change my favourites pretty fast.
Last week I had a free afternoon and had some time to stroll around the town and check my favourite perfume shops and cosmetics departements and got some new products I'd love to show you. Basically this post is all about the familiar and dearly loved and the new and exiting - the two things you shouldn't miss in your life (wow, from make up to life lessons.. that was unexpected!)

♥

Sleek MakeUP i-Divine au naturel Palette - Catrice Calligraph Ultra Slim Eyeliner Pen - one ginger morning bodymilk - MAC Studio Fix Fluid NC15

Let's start with the familar and dearly loved: My favourite bodymilk in the morning, one ginger morning by treaclemoon. The fresh and fruity smell of it is just amazing and really does wake up your senses and mind. It kind of reminds me of a salty sea breeze - it's refreshing and let's you take a deep breath (just that this isn't actually salty, it's just ginger-y. But still!) To be honest, most times getting up in the morning isn't as great as we all wish it would be. So I try to have my morning rituals as quick and time-saving as possible, and to help getting awake and feeling refreshed, this bodymilk definitely helps.

The second item I wouldn't want to miss is my Ultra Slim Eyeliner Pen by Catrice. This thing is magic. It's the thinnest and most easy to use eyeliner pen I've ever had. I'm quite the loser when it comes to eyeliner (liquid ones make me want to cry) so I've been looking for a good one and finally found this gem. It stays perfectly fine for the whole day, is super easy to apply and doesn't smear or gets stuck in the eyelashes. To cut a long story short: I'm as keen as mustard and will definitely rebuy this pen even for a third time.

Time to talk about my newly purchased gems! The first one is the Sleek MakeUp Palette in au naturel. As you can see, I've been using this a lot since I got it - which was only two weeks ago. The colors are strictly nude except for the super matte black shade to define your eye shape or create a smokey eye look. The shades are almost all matte, except for two shiney ones (but I actually don't like those shades very much). I've mostly been using the first very bright white shade called Nougat and the two darker shades Bark and Regal. The matte black Noir has only been used twice for when I was out and about in the city at night, but I've been loving it since it's really rich and well covering.

The last thing I got is actually my favourite. I've always wanted to own a mac foundation since I have only heard good things about them. I bought a clinique foundation this year in summer which was super expensive and isn't even my skin tone anymore so it looks super weird - it was time to get a new one! When I saw that the MAC Studio Fix Fluid was at a reasonable price I just went for it and got one. After talking to the shop assistant she picked out the perfect nuance for me and I've been using this foundation basically everyday since I got it. It's smooth, doesn't dry (at least not if you have more of an oily skin or remember to moisturize your face on a daily basis) and covers perfectly without looking cakey or fake. Now I know why everyone has been raving about mac - they really are as good. So if you're ever unsure about what foundation to pick and have a little more money saved up than you need for regular drugstore alternatives - try and give them a chance, those babies are magic.

♥

It's almost Christmas and I'm completely blown away by how beautiful my city looks at the moment. We have a super cute Christmas market with lights everywhere, there are so many little stalls showing artistic craftwork or handmade jewelry or sell a wide range of candies and it's just so amazing. Maybe I'll have time to take some photos tomorrow evening after work to show to you. 

Are you already in a festive mood or are you more of a summer kid? I'm definitely in love with winter (coats and big scarves and cute mittens!) but summer is also great (especially for wearing cute dresses and shorts!).

I hope you're having a great week and don't get stressed over buying last minute christmas presents!

Rebecca

What I wear - My favourite clothing items

Hi hello and a happy second advent to all of you! 

The last few days have been quite lazy and I was pretty uninspired on what to do for my next post, but today I had this one special item of clothing in my hands and there it was: The idea I needed. 
So today I want to show you my favourite items of clothing! Most of them are more summer-ish, but combined with tights and boots also fitting for autumn and winter.

The first thing I want to talk about is a dress I got recently from H&M. I didn't really like to shop there over the last three years since I felt like the quality of their products had dropped a lot and also they got increasingly more expensive - so I tried to avoid them. Lately they started to grow back on me, at least for dresses they've been having a lot of my attention. I got this lovely grey/black jersey dress online and on sale for a very reasonable price and the quality is surpisingly good. The material is very soft and not see-through, which I feel is quite the rarity these days. I already know I will be wearing this dress a lot throughout winter, preferably with a big belt on the waistline, coloured tights and my black studded boots.

♥

To stay with the topic, here's another dress I got from H&M a few months ago - it was quite the accident that I found this beautiful piece. My friend took me shopping and brought me into the shop and I started looking around, finding this dress and loving it on first sight. Also it was on sale so I couldn't resist and I've been not regretting this choice ever since. Definitely one of my absolute must haves for summer and winter. The necklace is by primark, a golden three-chained necklace with a heart and a key which I found quite fitting for the cute dress.

♥

The next thing isn't actually a dress but still pretty girly and feminine. I thrifted this lovely black chiffon high low skirt and the dotted crop top and instantly thought about combining those two with my all time favourite silver high heels. I plan on wearing this combo for my next night out partying since I feel this is quite chic but not too uptight for a night club. The statement necklace is by New Yorker.

♥

Last but not least I got this quite grungy outfit that I've been loving this last week, and again there's two pieces by H&M - I realize that although I said I don't like them that much, I mysteriously happen to own a lot of stuff from there. First thing I've been madly in love with are those platform sneakers. They are simply black and very unobtrusive but they can give an outfit the perfect finish - like with this combination of a basic black high waist short by H&M and the checkered blouse by Yessica.

♥

That's it for today. Have you got some clothing items you've been loving lately or couldn't live without?

(I'm thinking about posting another short update on my first Sleek palette that came in the mail yesterday. So maybe I'll talk to you later.)

Rebecca

Throwback #1: Old Facebook Photos

Hello!

Today was quite the lazy day for me, I didn't actually do anything interesting besides taking pictures of a few old(er) clothes for thrifting them online. Most of them I only wore two or three times and they still look pretty - just not my style anymore. Unfortunately, my h&m and forever 21 orders didn't get delivered today, so I can't show you my new stuff just yet, but if you're patient you'll get some pictures sooner or later.

Today's topic will be some old facebook pictures I found while browsing and I thought, well, why not blog about them? I guess everyone has their own journey to what they define as their style now, and mine was quite interesting (and sometimes really, really embarassing) so I thought I would show you some of my older pictures and hope you'll get a good laugh out of them - just like I did! (:


Chapter One: The time were I was really emo and wanted to be a scene kid so bad

Chapter Two: The Hair-Extension-Time

Chapter Three: The pseudo-artsy phase

Chapter Four:  The time I cut my hair really short (and actually liked it a lot)

 Chapter 5: Actually being out and about with friends

actual festival look 2014

Last Chapter: The latest selfie I took (Extensions again but huh)

 

That's everything for today. Hope you liked the post! Did you have a 'phase' or time you find quite embarassing when looking back?

Rebecca

**this is post no 3 for my so called blogmas**

Nail polish shenanigans

Hi, hello, and welcome back to Day 2 of my so called 'Blogmas'!

Since all those youtubers are doing vlogmas, and I am definitely not adventurous enough to upload any type of video material (today), I decided to have a little fun on my own and do some kind of Blogmas, where I blog every day up until Christmas. So here goes nothing!

Today, as you may have guessed by the title, I want to show you my favourite nail polishes. At the moment, I'm wearing a UV nail polish that my best friend did for me, but that's most definitely not the status quo. Normally I'm doing my nails all by myself.. *sad music playing in the distance*
Well, but there's a good side to this: I like to think that my nail doing skills are a little bit more than average and my nails tend to grow pretty quick, so they are quite long most of the time and I love painting them the craziest colors. 

But still, my favourite nail polishes aren't that crazy colored or weird, when it comes to my daily go tos, I try and keep my nails muted so they don't interfere with any colored clothing I might be wearing.

Okay, enough of the talk, here are my faves:

(I might've gotten a bit carried away on my new cute editing programm.. sigh)

What I prefer most are long, classic, black nails. I like how the color black used to be so connected with punk/emo/grunge culture but has recently gotten way more popular and accepted. In fact, black has to be my all time favourite colour for nails, and whenever I'm feeling uninspired I'll go back to my roots and keep it simple and chic with a shiny black polish. 
As you can see, there are still two bright and neon colours that I love to wear anytime I need a little dash of color with an outfit: It's a bright neon orange with a bit of pink and a light neon purple, both of those are by p2 and they dry so fast, it's almost magic. Perfect for me since I'm super impatient and always have like a hundred things to do even if I did my nails only 10 seconds ago. It's a nightmare and I tend to avoid polishes that need to dry longer than 30 seconds. It would need a very very extremely pretty color to make me sit through a 2 minute wait, really.
For my nude tones, I got a very pretty bright lilac tone called '255 mauve on' by Maybelline. I know you're thinking this colour is darker than the other purple one, but that's an illusion (oooh, magic again). The color is actually quite muted and not that covering, so I guess if you wanted the colour to be more intense you'd have to go with two or more layers. 
Last but not least I have a classy beige nude, a super muted shade that's been my go to whenever I couldn't stand any color on my nails. It's very pretty but also very discreet and subtle and perfect for when I'm wearing a colorful ring.


That's actually all for today. I've been very busy doing chores around the house today; I've actually sorted out my whole closet and washed loads of clothes and dusted my room and a lot of other boring stuff. I've taken some pictures of my wardrobe sorting so I may be featuring some of them in a future post about my favourite clothing items. (So stay tuned, I guess?)

Rebecca

Winter Necessities (.. at least makeup-wise.)

Finally, december's here! I've opened the first little door on my Advent Calendar, had some scented candles lighted the whole day (cinnamon is a gift from the heaven's above, I'm pretty sure about that) and my fairy lights seemed to shine just a little more sparkly and bright today. Yes, I'm already feeling festive.. like, a lot. 

So in hopes to send some of these oh so exciting feelings your way, I decided to put together my favourite makeup bits and pieces for this year's winter time - meaning, of course, my all time favourite holiday: Christmas ♥

the two candle holders are from ernsting's family for 2 euro each

p2 forever intense eye shadow cream - p2 volume affair lash wonder mascara -

essence 3D eyeshadow - revolution perfect lipstick by flormar

 

So the first thing I've already been loving throughout autumn is this amazing duo eye shadow by essence in the color 08 'irresistible vanilla latte'. It's extremely affordable since it's a drug store label, but nonetheless it's a definite must-have for me this winter. The two shades are a very shiny and bright natural white - meaning it's a quite warm and beige-y shade with a gorgeous shiny finish - and a warm, golden shade (almost bronze, I'd like to add) which compliment each other perfectly. I've been in love with the lighter white shade since day one, because it just brightens your eyes so much and makes them look all shiny and awake. 

♥

The second necessity this season is my all fresh and new p2 mascara in 010 'oh la la!'. Again, p2 is a drug store brand and super affordable - unfortunately I believe these are only sold in Germany, so if you're from a different country, I'm sorry. But still, this mascara is my all-time go to if it comes to dark, long lashes that are a tiny bit more dramatic than the "daily" look I go for. Meaning: This mascara makes your lashes look really thick and quite long, so you might want to avoid it if you're looking for a more natural finish. But for the festive season, I love to go a little overboard and dramatic, and if you're here for that just like me, this mascara might be your gadget of choice. 

♥

This p2 eye shadow cream in the color 010 'just the two of us' has been the latest addition to my make up collection. At first I got a bit scared at the thought of a cream eye shadow - in my mind it was heavy and cakey and destined to crumble and get all sticky and ugh, it just sounded very very wrong and I avoided anything like that at all costs. Now I've always loved to experiment with my make up and when I found those "forever intense" thingys, I was getting curious. So after a week of thinking about it I decided to try this peachy rosé shade and I admit I've been loving it ever since. It's a very shiny and bright shade and again, at a very reasonable pricing, so this is a definite recommendation.

♥

Coming to my last necessity, I'll just inform you that I had never heard of this make up brand ever before I found a shop that was selling only this, so don't worry if you're a bit confused - I was too. So the brand is called flormar and I discovered it while I 

was out and about in Frankfurt. It was a quite small shop but it looked cute so 

I decided to have a look around and I actually found a lipstick I liked 

(and a few other things, but I didn't buy those. Sigh). 

The color R13 is a dark and super pigmented and rich berry/violet. It's hard to describe actually and even harder to take a photo of cause the lighting always distorts the color. I've been using this lipstick mainly over the last few weeks and I really like the color a lot. Only the fact that you need to redo your lips like every 2 hours is a bit annoying. It makes your lips feel a little dry, so I wet them with my tongue and yeah, I guess lipsticks have a hard time on my lips haha 

actual footage of me wearing the revolution perfect lipstick by flormar

To make this short: Loving the color, not so much satisfied with the texture.

♥

I hope you liked this first post of mine - 
and I hope you continue to have a great first week of Advent!

Rebecca

**this is day 1 of my so-called 'blogmas', where I blog everyday up until christmas.**